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Our son is 31, lives with us and works parttime at a grocery store…large chain in the eastern US. He has worked there for over 6 years. Initially he had a job coach with him for all the 3 shifts he worked. As he got better and better at the tasks required, he neeed less and less job coaching and we cut back to, eventually, 1 hour a week. However, that sweet spot didn’t last. this past year he developed sudden onset of OCD behaviors. At home, we overlooked them. It just took him longer to get dressed, finish chores, etc. At work, it was another story. He was spinning in the aisles. He was putting products away, and then taking them off the shelves again. He was running thru the aisles, cutting in front of shoppers, and spacing out in the middle of a job task. The admins there have no interest in knowing what’s going on. ALl they knew was that he looked really weird and they were positive he was doing this stuff on purpose. We went back to 4 hours a week for job coaches, but they had no idea how to handle this type of behavior either. For that matter, I didn’t know what to say to our son – even though his psychiatrist dx him with OCD, she could only advise us to find a therapist with expertise in OCD and learn from her/him. We have been looking for a year now….still no tx in sight.
I go in and chat with the manager every week, just to create a friendship with him. When he complains about my son, I remind him that this is neurological and we are working on it. I thank him for our son’s job (even though he wasn’t the one who hired our kid, and if given a reason, would quickly fire him). I ask him to be patient. I tell him I will always work on these OCD issues as best I can.
But lately I’m getting sick and tired of kissing up to him. Why should I? Businesses who hire disabled individuals get perks from the Dept of Labor – so why am I stressing about the store managers and what they think of my kid? I stress and kiss up for my son’s sake. If he were to be fired, he would be devastated. It also occurs to me that (as research shows) early learning is the most effective…and its possible that this is who he is. Forgetful, unable to maintain a focus, and bound to show repetetive, obsessive behaviors that he is likely unaware of. Thanks for reading!
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